True Self

Sometimes I am too much my true self. You know what I mean? I am confident in my ability to do my job, but sometimes I let loose and share my thoughts with students. The other day was one of those days! To be fair, my daily coffee was delayed by about two hours, that is a real issue :) 

This is the look I give the RHDs when they cross me BEFORE coffee...

Professionalism has such a fine line. A young professional has an even harder time drawing that line. When working with first time professional staff members we talk about how to distinguish yourself from the students and how to present oneself. Residence Life is such a funny job in that respect, a fellow staff member has to know you well enough to support you. You have to learn enough about each other that you trust one another at 2am when you are confronting student behavior. Students have to also feel that too- they should know what it looks like when you are upset or happy or feeling goofy. Students can often see right through us when we are trying to hold in a comment or a laugh at an inappropriate time. I used to work pretty hard to hide it- I would never leave my apartment in sweatpants, my hair was always brushed and styled, and I would never cry in front of a student! Never! Now that I am over thirty I feel as though my filter has eroded away and I have been left with nothing in the professionalism department. I let it all hang out there. Sometimes it is funny, but most of the time it makes me nervous that I will cross the line in a non reversible kind of way. Thankfully if there was one department to be a goof and slightly inappropriate is Residence Life so I might be safe. I cry all the time now- in front of anyone-student or not. In the middle of the night I leave my house in sweatpants or long johns- whatever I happen to be wearing- to respond to emergencies. 

It is refreshing to just be yourself. I feel free at work to tell people when I am angry or when I am sad. It is refreshing to rely on that support from the office. When you think about it, I spend more time in the office or on campus then I do at home. You need to find that support. When my life was struck by sudden tragedy I found most of my support on campus with my work community. I am glad that ten plus years on the job has chilled me out and made me act like myself. It is a relief to just be me.